After the relationship.

Dearest Dr. Sunday,

I recently ended a long term relationship and there has been something weighing heavily on me. It is not a second guess of whether I did the "right thing", but why I am not hurt, nor confused about the situation.

This is someone I had spent every day with. Had held and whispered "I love you" to. Who was my best friend. The person I could spend every day with laughing, partying or just laying around in bed with. And in a series of days, all of this turned to dust and was quickly blown away by the wind. As I'm sure everyone else can relate to breakups, you would think I would be in tears and hurt. Instead, I shed a few tears and moved on immediately, never looking back. Fuck, I'm already dating someone else and it does not feel strange. It does not feel forced, nor too soon to be investing emotions into the girl I am seeing. Strange, right?

Not only this, but I am currently guessing that she is already interested and/or dating someone else as well. After finding this out, I sat back in bed and thought of her with someone else. Instead of pain or heartache filling me, it surprisingly made smile that she too is moving on and that she is happy. WTF, right?

I've never experienced anything like this before in all of my past relationships. This is why I am confused...

And here come the questions for you, Dr. Sunday:

Where was my grieving?
Where were the flooding tears and hurt?
Why am I completely okay dating someone else?
Why am I okay with her dating someone else?
Why do I feel so numb about this whole situation?
Was she really just a best friend who had a title of "girlfriend"?
Did I only love her as a best friend the entire time and that's why this is so easy?

What the fuck is going on here, Dr. Sunday? Because of what I have learned from past relationships and breakups, I don't feel human. I'm not depressed or upset about anything I have mentioned. Everything feels right. And that is the most interesting part to me.

I really need you to check my mechanical brain. It might have short-circuited... or maybe all systems are running perfectly (I side with the latter). Either way, I would like you to take a look inside.

love,
a robot

Dear Robot,

Is it really so strange to think that a decision you made seems, at least in the immediate present following the decision, to be without painful repercussion? That you could decide upon a thing, act upon it, and feel good about what you have done? I warn you, Robot, that in examining the circuits and gears of your robot brain, I may offer you more questions than answers-- but I believe that I can at least guide your programming to better self-diagnosis. Bear in mind, my pretend-internet doctorate is in Bombast, Assholery, and Knowitalletry, not robotics-- but I will do my best.

On the surface level, of course one might expect, in the ending of a relationship, to find tears on one side or other of the equation. Of course, this question comes from your side, so yours is the side that I can address. You followed your story with a series of questions, all which point towards common answers-- you want to know if there is something wrong with you, or something you might have missed in the definition of your prior relationship state, that would explain why now you feel happy for the current case of affairs (your new adventure, and the other party's new adventure). You say that you have never experienced this sort of thing in the ending of a relationship-- and you wonder what that means, as well.

So, where is your grief? You have stated that you "shed a few tears, and moved on immediately, never looking back." Let me suggest a few possibilities here. Firstly, were those few tears enough for you? Or did the act of moving on anesthetize you, at least in the short term, against further tears? Do you think that your quick forward step into a new relationship means something here? Perhaps moving forward made it easier for you not to grieve (at least for right now). Or perhaps the fact that you were willing to move on so immediately means that your level of commitment to the lost relationship was not as you believed it to be. Perhaps the time you spent together meant something different to each of you.

Is it possible that the recent events have happened so close together that you haven't had time to explore in full the things you may feel later on? It is hard to say. Every heart is different, every situation, every love-- only you know what you are truly feeling, and how honest you are allowing yourself to be regarding your heart. Is this self-defense? Is this a calm before the storm? Is this the peace that comes with doing what you believe in your heart to be right for you? The answer to your dilemma lies somewhere between these points, and in your place I would spend time reflecting thereupon.

You wondered whether or not your previous relationship was, in whole or in part, not as you imagined, at least from your side. Did your heart change? Would you have noticed? Were you preparing an exit strategy, with eyes towards a future of your own during the relationship at any point? Further, do you think that the kind of time spent together perhaps led you towards familiarity rather than romance? It is hard to say. A good relationship, at least in my opinion (which is what matters here, as this is MY blog), consists of a combination of deep friendship and deep passion. Maybe somewhere along the way, at least in YOUR heart, the line between friendship and passion was crossed and blurred until it was hard to see for you-- and the constant time spent together made it hard for you to really see that something had changed. You can't see the movie if you're sitting in the front row, you know?

Perhaps this would explain why you would be happy for her when the time comes for her to move on with her life. Maybe in the course of all of this you realized that the care you hold in your heart for this lady is such that you wish her happiness. Sometimes relationships end in bitter circumstances-- so without knowing the exact shape your ending there took, I cannot say whether the spite and bitterness that sometimes appears therein has fallen. I would imagine that while you have acted such, taking steps towards your own future and away from her, that you are at least decent enough to feel bad for any pain you might have caused-- it would only follow, logically, then, that you would wish her well. Only you know how you really feel there, and only time will tell just what the outcome of your choices may be.

Of course, sometimes, Robot, "everything feels right" because it is. Sometimes the right thing is hard to do-- maybe not hard for you, but hard for someone else. Sometimes, you make choices that won't be popular or easy, and that may cause pain to people who do not deserve to be hurt--but ultimately, time will tell. Maybe you're getting off easy at the moment-- but if you did what you believe is right, and believed it enough to be willing to take this kind of step, even if it hurt someone else, then you did what you had to do. Maybe the lady's hurting-- maybe she's in the same boat as you, relieved in some respects, ready for a new adventure, or just taking some time to reflect. It isn't your worry anymore, regardless of the case--you gave up the right to that worry when you ended things.

So, Robot, is something wrong with you? Or is everything as it should be, now? I advise, rather than worrying about why you are not worrying at all, that you focus on functioning as well as you can, leading your life, doing no harm and keeping those gears oiled and turning. A chapter in your life is past, and a new one begins-- do not let your memory chips get cluttered. Save that which is good and beautiful, or what is wise and instructive. Learn, live, and grow. You have time to find your own answers, as we all do in our own adventures.

I hope this has helped you. If you need further advice, you know where to find me.

Always listening,
Dr. Sunday

Let's talk about sex.

Dear Dr Sunday,
I was wondering if you had any advice for a couple. We've been together for a little more than two years and we don't have sex very much anymore. We still love each other but for some reason we're just not doing it that often- maybe once or twice a month. When we first got together we used to do it like three or four days out of the week at least. Im still very attracted to my boyfriend and hes still very attracted to me, but how can we make things a little more interesting for both of us? I dont want us to stop being interested in each other or to start looking elsewhere. Can you help us pleeeeease?
Frustrated in Fremont

Dear Frustrated,

Using extra vowels in the word "please" is a great way to get my attention, apparently. That was a joke. Never do that again. (also a joke, fyi)

Let me break this down for you as simply as possible. We're going to address this issue on two fronts-- causes and symptoms. This is going to require some work on your part-- but if you really care the way that you claim to, and I have no reason to doubt that you do, then you'll find this a breeze.

Ok. Now, to proceed logically, let me ask you: is something different in your relationship? Has something changed, qualitatively or quantitatively, in the nature of your interactions with your boyfriend, that might impact this? Are you spending less time together, are you spending less time thinking about each other? Is someone taking someone else for granted, is one partner more selfish than the other, have you both begun to drift, etc? Has something HAPPENED? Are both of you in good health? Do you live together, do you see each other often? Are you both honest about your needs and feelings, or your level of commitment to the relationship? How do YOU feel about YOURSELF? How does HE feel about HIMSELF? Etc.

Here's the thing, Frustrated. ANY of the above could factor into a reduction in the affection level. Are you physically affectionate enough OUTSIDE of sex? It's easy, in the first blush of a relationship, to hold hands, touch, be close, be intimate, make your friends nauseous through public displays of affection-- but when you're alone, do you still kiss good night? Do you still say "I love you" every time you meet? Does this love, honestly, to you, mean enough to you that you're willing to give of yourself? And what of him?

Those questions themselves pose suggestions, surely, if they are in fact the problem, but since our correspondence, at the moment, is limited to an email and your response (at least until you write more, I suppose), all I can say is ask yourself all of the above and if you find an issue, address it-- and if you need more advice, by all means, feel free to ask. This advice thing is kind of what I do, right?

Now. How, in the short term, to address the problem? Well, for the sensibilities of my readers, I'll keep this relatively clean, though I do believe my advice will lend itself well to resolution of your immediate sexual concerns, while you choosing to pursue and face any root matters (if any) as listed above, or otherwise, will address the problem at its core. In other words, I can't help you love your man any more than I can help him to love you, though I can probably give you some advice to get you both screwing like you should already be.

Thought one: honesty. If you're both concerned about not having enough sex, then try to figure out why. Sure, it gets less hot if you're scheduling it, but for FUCK'S FUCKING SAKE, make time for each other, with an emphasis on that. Since it's you writing me (and not HIM writing me) I'd suggest that you take the reins here yourself (figuratively OR literally). Are you really that attracted to him? Do you love him? Then SEDUCE the guy. Use your charms and wiles. Talk to him. Ask him about fantasies. Seriously. Sounds corny, but if you suddenly reveal something about your own, he's going to feel a bit comfortable stepping forward to tell you something. See if that's not something you can work with. I can guarantee you, unless he reveals some unforeseen really sick fetish, you're both going to have one HELL of a time with that talk, especially if you really make sure it keeps going well past the initial awkwardness. You'll thank me. Talk about what you both want, and see how long it takes to start seeing some of that come to life.

Thought two: what you already know. You're the one writing me, not him, so maybe he doesn't read this blog (if so, he's probably not worth fucking anyway, but since you love him, I'll assume he's a loyal reader, and pretend I was just joking when I said that). This says clearly that you really want to make this happen, but you're at a loss. You're at the end of your rope, so to speak, and you need more than what you have. So get more. Make this happen yourself. You know this guy. You know him a lot better than I do. Surprise him. Give him what he wants: positions, costumes, location, roleplay, talk, accessories, unrestrained passion--whatever it is that you know he would enjoy. Give him something that's going to leave him wanting more. Send him a message, write him a letter, take a picture (but only if you're sure this is going to last, obviously), or just fucking surprise him when he least expects it. Show up and tell him you need something, get it and then go home. He'll be so blindsided that he'll be forced to take a whole new perspective on who you are-- and if he's really into you, he's going to find himself a lot more willing. And if you're the problem, if you're the one who isn't as willing, then giving yourself time to use what you know of him to plot, plan, and scheme for amazing experiences, you're going to feel like more of a sexual person. You can't be lazy with love. You have to give, you have to show effort, you can't merely expect things to happen in their own time. Those kinds of thoughts are exactly why this kind of thing happens to people.

Being male myself, I can state categorically that if you provide him with something that is a true EXPERIENCE, you're going to give him the kind of gift (memories, desire, satisfaction) that will keep him focused on you-- and at the same time, you're going to find yourself a lot more interested, as you work to make things more interesting. And it won't take much effort in that way to really let love (or at the very least, sex) to engage itself into making things a lot hotter and more interesting than you ever thought possible, or ever could have accomplished alone.

Trust me, I'm a pretend internet Doctor. I'm not going to let you down on this one. If you do as I say, you won't let yourself (or him) down either. I've got plenty more I could tell you, but I'd rather not denote this particular entry as NSFW. Believe in yourself, use your creativity, and if you really want this, the appetite will provide the impetus. Do it! It's on you now. Stop reading (for tonight) and start plotting!

I hope this has helped you.

Always Listening,
Dr. Sunday

Shorties, Anonymous, and Facebook: a collection of the brief.

*****Dear Readers-- what you are about to read is a list of random short questions asked of me, whether via anonymous emails (some nice, some fake, some douchey), or comments left on my facebook page. Thought I'd share, because, well, I want to, and this is MY blog. If you don't like it, you're probably not reading this anyway. So enjoy, friends. --The Doctor.*****

#1- Doctor: Itchy head.. Do I have lice? And if so, Will you pick them out? --T.

Dear T: Getting checked for lice is fun and easy-- those popsicle stick things they run through your hair kind of feel good on the scalp.
Lice-picking is a premium service, not included within the Dr. Sunday free project, but I could probably offer you a coupon or something. I'd also advise not wearing the other kids' hats. Love, Dr. Sunday

#2- Doctor Sunday: My question for you is... My boyfriend is turning 28 in August and I have no idea what to do for him. I know I want to do something very creative and adventurous but I'm running low on ideas. Any thoughts??? --M.

Dear M: Might I suggest, firstly, a surprise party, on a date at least one week prior to his birthday? I successfully caught my dear Claudia with a great surprise party by enlisting (without her knowledge) the help of a couple of her friends (whom she didn't know I had contact with; I used facebook and was VERY tricky). A surprise party ON the birthday would be too easily deduced.

Are we discussing a gift, an event, or a combination thereof? In my experience (as in, being a guy), I will tell you that nothing moves me more than an experience I can remember forever, or something I can hold onto and look back on repeatedly, whether it be a poem, a hand-made gift or hand-made card, or simply a letter on clever stationary. I'm the sentimental type, so a keepsake is a lot more meaningful to me than say, that video game I've been dying to play, which I'll play through once and then never again. I don't know if your man falls into that category, but that would certainly make your job easier.

Using your wits, you can guarantee the kind of birthday surprise for your boyfriend that he'll never forget.

Always listening,
Dr. Sunday

#3-- Doctor Sunday- Why are you such a homo? --Goat-Sodomizing Fuckbottle [identity edited by the editor because I fucking CAN]
Dear GSF,
It's 2009, why not? Dr. Sunday just loves people. Plus, you're really cute. Piss off, my dear Goat-Sodomizing Fuckbottle, and if you feel again like speaking to me, at least be funny. Keep reaching for that rainbow! --Dr. Sunday

#4-- Dr. Sunday, Where the hell did my pants go??????!@? --K.
Dear K.,
They are under my bed, in my box of keepsakes, because your love means so much to me that I can't imagine being able to part with them. I regret the necessity of sneaking up behind you with a chloroform soaked rag, just to steal your pants, but to be honest, after the roller coaster/whirlwind madness we shared, I simply didn't believe that you'd be willing to part with even such a simple keepsake.

Or maybe that was a joke. I'd advise looking through your laundry hamper aggressively, or looking under your bed. Normally, when I can't find an article of clothing, it has either been misfiled in my closet/dresser/etc, or buried somehow in my laundry, if not appropriated by my beloved cat as part of his fortress under my bed.
Hope this helps you.
Love,
Dr. Sunday

#5 Dr Sunday-- (*editor's note, spelling in this query has been corrected, and rather extensively at that): what is your problem with BC13? I read your post and you're just running your mouth like an asshole. no one asked you. --the dank knight
Dear "The Dank Knight,"
First off, yes, someone DID ask me. Secondly, you clearly didn't read the post thoroughly enough, but I'd blame that on the apparently severe level of cognitive disability you displayed so memorably across your email. Tell your mother or special needs provider that I told you to "write back when puberty hits, or functional literacy-- whichever comes first." Twat. Sincerely, Dr. Sunday.
PS- the "DANK KNIGHT?" seriously? dude. Wow.

*****And I'll close there. I've got more, but I'll save those for a future date. I'd once again like to remind you to feel free to ASK ME ANYTHING, and thank you, my dear readers, for making this blog such a fun and successful project.
Much love, and always listening,
Dr. Sunday*****

Forgiveness

Dear Dr. Sunday,

I have recently done a great wrong against someone who means a lot to me (infidelity). Because of this wrong, I will never be able to even talk to this person again to make it up to them. Part of what I did was the result of mistakes I have made from overreaching flaws as a person; bad habits in my personality. I feel like I owe it to this person (and to my karma) to make amends but i also want to make the kinds of changes in my personality so I can be no longer such a selfish, thoughtless and cruel person anymore. What advice could you give me on these goals, and how can I make amends to someone I can never speak to again?

--Loveless in Loveland

Dear Loveless,

It is always important to learn from one's mistakes, and to give the best that one can to improving oneself. If you have wronged someone, of course it is best that you apologize, and if amends can be made, you should make them-- not just until you feel that you have satisfied your obligation, but rather until you know that the wounds you have caused have been healed as best they can.

You know that what you did was wrong. You feel guilt. Good. You should be hurting. You should look that pain in the face, and know the depths of the sins you have committed, until you know that you will be a better person, and can look back on the wrongs of the past to find yourself with the will and the impetus to change. Ask yourself what it was that you did so wrong, and what aspects of your personality led you to this. You said you were selfish and thoughtless; become someone generous. Become someone who puts others before the self. It's not hard to make little changes in your life, and these little changes become habitual, and then habits become realities. Just as simple as all of that.

Of course, you said the bridge has been burned. How can you make it up to someone who cannot or will not speak to you, let alone listen to you? There are multiple thoughts I might suggest, and they are yours to use as you see most fit. But first, ask yourself this: what do you want from the idea of making amends? A clean conscience in yourself, or to genuinely heal a wound in someone about whom you care? Are you doing this for you, or for the wronged party?

I hope it's both. You will find that while some wrongs DO put you in the kind of place you are now, where there can be no healing, no return to the way things were, that you are too late to change things. Some decisions cannot be taken back, some actions last forever. This does not, however, mean that you need to just lie down and die.

You can't "fix" this person, this wrong, this event that happened, whose inertia still carries you forward into suffering and guilt. You can assuage the guilt by choosing to become a better person, and making active improvements-- not just saying "I'll never do THAT again" or "I'm going to be generous and NOT self-centered anymore," but rather say only things that you can support. If you want these changes to be real, you have to make them stick. Random kindnesses are good. Sharing your story with someone who needs comfort is better. When given the choice to choose between yourself and someone about whom you care-- choose the latter, and throw yourself into it with passion and fervor. You'll find it makes a lot of difference. You'll find that you're much happier a person for it. You might not be able to do a kindness to this person you've harmed, but you can repay it to the universe, for a clean bill of karma.
I'd advise against trying to contact someone who has built a wall against you, if this is the case. The best gift you can give in that circumstance is respect-- don't tear open someone else's scabs just to make your own conscience feel better. Give him or her time to heal. Maybe someday you'll meet again, and maybe not. Maybe someday they'll hear about something truly charitable that you've done, some way in which you've proven that you are NOT defined by your sins, wrongs, harm and misconduct. Only you know what shape you have to take to make this right. It's not too late to improve yourself.

One last thing I will advise-- the way to make a lesson last is to not merely forget it ever happened. You will always know what you did. You will always carry that wrong. You should never feel like, even though you've paid your debt, that it doesn't matter anymore. Even if you are the only one who remembers it, keep it in your heart, as a reminder. If you burn your hand in a fire, you're going to come away with a scar-- and you'll know not to put your hand in a fire anymore. Similarly, let this be a scar in your heart, one that maybe only you can see, but a lesson learned and a tale told.

You have, as we all do, the capacity for great kindness as well as great harm. If you can make this right, do it. If you want to change who you are, don't just SAY it-- do it. Prove it. And don't ever stop proving it. You're not a generous person if you're never giving. You're not selfless person if you're always putting yourself first. make the changes, and don't give up. You'll find that the real answer to your question is in taking the time, and taking the steps your heart tells you.

I hope this has been helpful for you. Be strong-- the desire to improve is the first step towards personal improvement.

Always Listening,
Dr. Sunday

Overly Sensitive/Special Night

Dear Doctah Sunday,

I think I need to work on my skin-density or something. Tengo dos issues, and I think they maybe both stem from me being way too worried about not disappointing anyone, but who knows. That's where you come in:

Uno) I have a friend who, as I get busier, is increasingly guilt-trip-inducing when I can't hang out. And if I can hang out, but not for what would be in said-friend's mind "long enough," I get an almost worse guilt trip. And it's a mean guilt trip, not a teasing one. It's abusive and hurtful at times. I think I'm a pretty good person, but these aggressive texts I get just make me recoil. What do I do? Ignore it? Confront it? Try to create more time in my day through some blend of alchemy and science fiction?

Dos) Being, as mentioned, pretty busy of late, I feel like I've let go of some of the romance with mah significant lover. He's been super supportive and awesome, and I need to make up my mind to DO something to show him how great he is. Should I: Make him a romantic dinner (even though I make dinner pretty often...so that might not seem that special)? If so, what? Buy some new lingerie? Make him a card? Something not as lame as those ideas that I'm not creative enough to think of?

Also: What color dress should I buy to wear to Dance_MF on the River (a.k.a. Waterway Ballet, Motherfucker)?

Love,
Overly-Sensitive in Downtown

Dear Overly,

I can utterly and personally relate to your circumstances as stated. I will address each issue in turn, but as there is a bit of overlap contextually, I think I can speak to the general circumstances at large in a fashion that should be helpful.

Having consorted with the powers of darkness for decades, I can assert that there are few methods for manipulation of time that are worth noting. A drug habit is usually a great way to make sure you stay awake more, effectively adding hours to the day, but often at the detriment of your health-- therefore, I recommend not making use of that particular route. The answer, really, is in simply doing your best, and attempting organization. I'm a busy person myself, drawn and quartered by more horses and forces than I care to relate; my way of maximizing my time is to enforce habits that act against my decadent nature. I plan, because I'm naturally impulsive. I use logic, because I'm a very emotional and irrational creature of dubious sanity. I create schedules and adhere to them, and treat them just as I treat my job-- this is merely the shape of my life, and within the strictures of this sonnet, I make my time as i will. You can't make more hours in the day-- but you can make the best of the hours you have.

You're clearly, as your name suggests, a sensitive person. The desire to please those in our lives who matter to us is a common one, but this desire needs to be tempered by a certain level of pragmatism, or it becomes a curse more so than a gift. You wouldn't have guests over for a proper dinner party if your dirty socks and undergarments were strewn wildly about the living room, or the kitchen was filled with dishes so encrusted with dried food and mold that they've begun to resemble artifacts from Pompeii. You'd tidy up first, take a little time to prepare. Similarly, you must approach the intersection of your professional and personal lives with that same level of pragmatic attention. Do what you have to do, and when this is done, everything else can follow.

But that's merely the general side. On the specific level, let's start with query Uno. Your friend is being highly unfair to you in not respecting the other demands upon your life. You knew that part. How to address it, though; this depends on firstly what you know of your friend. I can suggest a couple of ways one might deal with the situation. The simplest, of course, being the indirect approach, or as I like to call it "let THEM deal with it." Go as you must, do what thou wilt, and when the snide and snarkiness hits your text messaging screen, you make the conscious choice to remind yourself that you have no reason to feel guilty. In fact, you're being wronged by that. You can choose to ignore the messages, particularly as they turn sour-- one of the best communication techniques afforded us by the advent of text messaging is that silence can be interpreted any number of ways. If you get an aggressive or ugly text, you can ignore it, and let the sender make of that as they will. If they're the kind of friend worth having, they may just think, upon cooling down, that they've crossed a line, and thus learn a lesson. The problem here isn't on YOUR end. You're living your life. You just have a needy friend who has a schedule far less busy than your own, who lacks in social graces, and is clearly trying to exploit your sensitive nature into guilt reactions. There's no reason to succumb to any of that. At all.

If it gets worse, I'd confront the person directly. A simple phone call, or perhaps a face-to-face conversation in calmer times. You can't see this person as often as you normally do, but if you stop by, say your peace, and do it respectfully, you'll likely get a good result. If it doesn't work, it's not your fault-- maybe this friend is not the best kind, or maybe there are factors present causing stress to your friend, leading them to act contrary to their past nature. Regardless of how you choose to deal actively with the situation, whether you ignore or confront (and if it was me, I'd ignore, and only confront if it didn't improve), the real lesson here is to not choose this burden for your own shoulders. You're carrying the weight of your own life, your own problems, your own stresses; you're far better off not adding to that load simply because a friend of yours is insensitive.

That's my word on that. I hope it helps. Question Dos is much easier. Speaking as both a male and a particularly awesome one at that, I can suggest that you think in terms of an event, to reward your beau for his supportive nature. Rather than simply going with a dinner, or a card, or the lingerie (all really great ideas), I would try to make a night, or a weekend, or a day, whatever, of it all-- plan in detail an event, for just the two of you. Think of things, small things, things you can make, things you can do, things you can create. The perfect itunes playlist, the perfect dinner; the perfect mood, the perfect moment. A combination of small things can become a memory that will carry this young man much further than an isolated gift. The tangible things are beautiful, but a memory goes everywhere. Consider what would make HIM happy, and what would excite you in preparing for him, from top to bottom: mood, sounds, intimacy, attention. I love the idea of hand-made gifts and a well-prepared dinner, but with a little planning, you can combine all the best of your many lovely charms into a night he will carry in his heart for the rest of his life. Plus, you're going to have an amazing time plotting, planning, and conniving. Use your good judgement-- I'm fully confident that you'll be able to exceed even your own expectations.

Regarding your final aside: with your coloration, I've always thought green a good look for you, provided it's a rich one. The symbolism of vitality while dancing and debauching on the mighty Ohio River is potent indeed. That's just off the top of my head, though.

I hope this has been helpful for you, and remember: you can strike a balance no matter how slender the beam. This is true for every aspect of your life. If you need any further advice, you know where to reach me.

Always Listening,
Dr. Sunday